PROSPECTIVE STUDENTS

     If you are reading this, you are no doubt a serious student, looking for an all-business approach to graduate school. You have at last come to the right place. As the Center for Rock Abuse Staff Meeting photo on the left clearly demonstrates, when you join us as a Junior Petrosadist, you will place your nose to the grindstone, and will not raise it until the day you graduate - if then (and if you ever do actually graduate, bien entendu). You will go to class, slave in the lab with your fellow petrosadists, study until you weep and gnash your teeth, and YOU WILL LIKE IT!

     At the Center for Rock Abuse, the work itself is, naturally, extremely rewarding. In the first place, the Second Law of Thermodynamics is excluded by Act of the Colorado State Legislature from the sacred precincts of the Green Center basement. To carefully and meticulously prepare a sample, to slowly and painstakingly bring it up to temperature and pressue, and to record 90 data points only to have the sample crumble and leak before the last, absolutely critical 91st - 100th, is practically unheard of, occurring in only 83.267% of all samples.

     Second, most inmates Junior Petrosadists eventually adjust surprisingly well to the psychologically demanding nature of rock squeezing. Skeptics are referred to our Frequently Asked Questions page for the transcript of a psychiatric evaluation interview with one of our recent graduates, right before they took him away for a long rest.

     Third, since it takes so long to adequately train a Junior Petrosadist, lab safety is paramount. Reassure your parents and significant others. We can't afford to lose very many of you. Besides, we've heard it involves a lot of paperwork.

     If, after reading this page, you are still unaccountably interested in the Center for Rock Abuse, please email Dr. Mike Batzle (Geophysics) or Dr. Manika Prasad (Petroleum Engineering) to find out more. Those of you who really have it bad should also visit the Prospective Students page on the CSM website, and fill out the appropriate application for admission, if you haven't already. You can also visit the Tutorials page on this website, to see some actual documents related to Center for Rock Abuse labwork.

This page updated last on December 31, 2008